Hilarious misheard lyrics

Lyrics I've misheard.

• In "Helena" by My Chemical Romance I heard "tweeeeeezers, tweeeeeeeeeeeeezers."
• In "Pumped Up Kicks" I heard "faster than my butt" instead of "faster than my bullet."
• In "Dynamite" I heard "eeeyyyyyo, Galileo."
• In "Bulletproof Heart" by My Chemical Romance I heard "we have to run away, Scott's got a photograph."
• I've misheard too many lyrics in "Unholy Warcry" by Rhapsody of Fire. Some of my favorites include "deep in the secret cave wookies are waiting" and "we must kill the beaver king." The real lyrics are "deep in the secret cave a book is awaiting" and "we must kill the demon king."
• In "Brick By Boring Brick" by Paramore I heard "go get your chauffeur" instead of "go get your shovel."
• In "Honey This Mirror Isn't Big Enough For the Two of Us" by My Chemical Romance, I heard the F-word a bunch of times... even though it's only said once in the entire song. 
• I heard my Mom talk about the song "Jumping Someone Else's Train" by The Cure, and I thought she was saying "Jump In Someone Else's Tree."
• In "Hot Hot Hot!!!" by The Cure, I heard "hey, hey, hey, well, I like it when that black man comes" instead of "I like it when that lightning comes."
• In "Friday I'm In Love" by The Cure, I heard "to see you eat in the middle of the night," and I'm still not sure what the actual lyrics are, or if those ARE the actual lyrics. 
• In "Live to Party" by The Jonas Brothers, I just heard a bunch of lyrics about poop. Of course, I've only heard that song from a musical Christmas ornament, and I've always hated their music, so... 

Funny lyrics others have misheard:

• My brother's friend used to love Transformers. He would always sing the theme song, but he said "robots in the sky" instead of "robots in disguise."
• In "I'm Not Okay (I Promise)" by My Chemical Romance, someone on the internet said they heard "the pages are all toilet-trained" instead of "the pages are all torn and frayed."
• Another person on the internet misheard "Brick By Boring Brick" the same way I did, except they also heard "to bury Picasso."
• In "Beat It" by Micheal Jackson, my brother heard "don't want to be a b****, you want to be a man" instead of "don't want to be a boy, you want to be a man."

Deeper/Literal Meanings to Songs Illustrated: If I Ruled the World - Big Time Rush

Come to think of it, this is actually a pretty accurate representation of the liberal, conservative, and libertarian views on certain issues...

Deeper/Literal meanings to songs illustrated: One Less Lonely Girl - Justin Bieber

The greatest Noah's Ark picture ever

Drawn by me, of course. :)

If you ever have a crush on a guy who likes making Mexican food...

This will be the perfect card for him:

Awesome pick-up lines

1. "I like donuts. BTW, you're donuts."
2. "Your eyes are so beautiful, they make the stars look crappy."
3. "Hey girl. It's me, Chad." (Even if your name isn't Chad, and you're not flirting with a girl)
4. "I appreciate how you never try to kill me. It's nice."
5. "You are so H-O-O-T." (And no, that was not a typo)
6. "I burned my finger, but it was nothing compared to the flames of my heart!"

Deeper/literal meanings to songs.

• "Old McDonald" is a song in memory of a farmer named Old McDonald. People heard the animals making noises, but what they didn't know is that they were plotting to run over Old McDonald with a tractor. The animals ended up killing him and his last words were "EE-I-EE-I-OH!" 
• "One Less Lonely Girl" by Justin Bieber is about a serial killer who kills girls who are single. He pretends to fall in love them, is super nice to them, and then kills them ("there's going to be one less lonely girl").
• "Boyfriend" by Justin Bieber is about a guy who holds his girlfriends hostage ("if I was your boyfriend, I'd never let you go") and owns a bunch of robotic birds.  
• "Firework" by Katy Perry is about Katy Perry having a baby that's a firework. The firework thinks he's a plastic bag, so she's yelling at him saying "baby, you're a firework."
• "Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town" is a song about a stalker who happens to be named Santa Claus who eats the naughty little children. People sing it to little children to scare them into being good.
• "Fix You" by Coldplay is about an evil doctor who tries to fix his patient's anmesia by shining blindingly bright lights in her eyes until she remembers where she is. ("Lights will guide you home, and I will try to fix you.")
• "Baby" by Justin Beiber is about a father who is devastated because his baby is going to be used in a human sacrifice and he'll never get to see him again. ("Baby, baby, baby, ohhhh, I thought you'd always be mine...")
• "Blow" by Ke$ha is about a group of teenagers who are trapped in an abanoned building that's going to explode and they know they're going to die, so they decide to just party until the bomb goes off. ("This place is gonna blow!!!")
• "Jar of Hearts" by Christina Perri is about someone robbing an organ donation storehouse. ("Who do you think you are... collecting your jar of hearts...")
• "Bulletproof Heart" by MCR is about a guy floating around ("gravity don't mean too much to me") and swine are chasing him ("these pigs are after me").
• "Rumor Has It" by Adele is about The Rumor from The Umbrella Academy.
• "Last Christmas I Gave You My Heart" is about someone who got a heart transplant on Christmas and then died the next day. Their heart was donated yet again, this time to science ("last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day you gave it away").
•  "Stole My Heart" by One Direction is about a girl that literally steals hearts (like, she literally takes hearts out of people's bodies). Somehow, a guy survives and he ends up falling in love with her. But he ended up loosing his voice for some reason ("I start to say, 'I think I love you', but I make no sound").
• "Burning Up" by the Jonas Brothers is about someone who kills himself to please the girl he likes by burning himself with volcano lava ("I'm burning up for you").
• "Never Let You Go" by Justin Bieber is about a guy who is killed by this girl, goes to heaven ("you took me to heaven"), and then possesses the girl who killed him ("I'll never let you go").
• "Back to December" by Taylor Swift is about a girl was just released from prison who was in love with a prison guard ("turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you"). She decides to go back in time to be with him again ("I go back to December").
• "S/C/A/R/E/C/R/O/W" is about Batman.
• "Call Me Maybe" is about someone living in an oppressive society where people have numbers on their foreheads (like in The Birthday Massacre's music video for "Looking Glass"). And this girl has really, really long bangs to cover her forehead as a sign of protest. She meets this guy wearing ripped jeans and apparently wearing ripped jeans is illegal ("ripped jeans, skin was showing"), showing that he was also kind of a rebel. So she shows him the number on her forehead and tells him to call her "Maybe" because she thinks it would make a pretty name ("call me maybe").
• "What Makes You Beautiful" by One Direction is about a girl who literally lights up the world, and she's really beautiful, but every time she looks in the mirror, she sees an ugly monster because the mirror is haunted. 
• "Hey Soul Sister" is about a stalker ("I don't want to miss a single thing you do tonight").
• "Rolling in the Deep" by Adele is about her boyfriend drowning with all their money in his pocket.
• "Planet Earth" by Duran Duran takes place after everyone and everything in the world has been killed, except a few sheep. Then some aliens come to earth, and the sheep tell them where they are.
• "Lullaby" by The Cure is about Spider-Man being a cannibal.
• "I Knew You Were Trouble" is about Taylor Swift dating the game Trouble. And apparently Trouble is also an airplane pilot.
• "If I Ruled the World" by Big Time Rush is about a guy who wants to overthrow the government so everyone can party.
   

I apologize if I've repeated some of my past blog posts, but whatever.